I'm just looking for a little mystery in life... like things you can't explain. Like, you go to Mexico, they tell you don't drink the water. You go to any diner here, who brings you the water? It's a mystery.
Boxing is a great exercise ... as long as you can yell "cut" whenever you want to.
It's hard not to be afraid. Be less afraid.
If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
At one point he decided enough was enough.
My father was a small claims court jester.
There's a pizza place near where I live that sells only slices. In the back, you can see a guy tossing a triangle in the air.
My neighbor has a circular driveway... he can't get out.
If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?
I saw a vegetarian wearing a furry coat. so I looked closer. it was made of grass.
I changed my headlights the other day. I put in strobe lights instead! Now when I drive at night, it looks like everyone else is standing still.
The other day when I was walking through the woods, I saw a rabbit standing in front of a candle making shadows of people on a tree.
I took a course in speed waiting. Now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes.
The sign said "eight items or less". So I changed my name to Les.
When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street.
I invented the cordless extension cord.
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
Worst Month of the Year: February. February has only 28 days in it, which means that if you rent an apartment, you are paying for three full days you don't get. Try to avoid Februarys whenever possible.
Climbers seem to forget that we said in our introduction that there were simply '50 classic routes', not 'the 50 classics'. We chose 50 from a list of about 120. Only a torturer will ever pry loose from our lips the names of those other 70 classics.
There is no path I follow. I feel as if I'm just drifting along, because although I can progress physically, through my training, mentally and spiritually I don't know what the hell I'm doing. It's like that car sticker: 'Don't follow me, I'm lost'.
I'm not going to retire because I want the money. We want honest athletes, but at the same time, you're going to have people saying, 'He's so greedy. He's made X amount of money, and he has to take that last little bit.' Yes, I do have to take that last little bit. I'm sorry if that is frustrating to some, but if they were in my shoes, they would do exactly the same thing.
I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal: high enough so you can look up her dress.
At the end of the day, it's all about what's on the shelf at the end of the year.
I'm gonna hump ya. Like Deputy Dog... Would hump ya.
If it was just the potatoes that were affected, at the end of the day you will pay the price if you're a fussy eater.
