Fun Quotes - Page 282

Playing scales is like a boxer skipping rope or punching a bag. It's not the thing in itself; it's preparatory to the activity

To buy books would be a good thing if we could also buy the time to read them; but the purchase of books is often mistaken for the assimilation and mastering of their contents.

The public doesn't want new music; the main thing it demands of a composer is that he be dead.

When fate hands us a lemon, let's try to make lemonade.

I've done my share of busking, and it's fun until it isn't. There are musicians in the subways that will make you cry, they're so good.

Everyone knows that a man can marry even if he reaches the age of 102, is penniless, and has all his facilities gone. There is always some woman willing to take a chance on him.

Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.

Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

We talkin' about practice?

Television has brought back murder into the home - where it belongs.

There is nothing so good as a burial at sea. It is simple, tidy, and not very incriminating.

I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest of my life, and hopefully after that as well.

One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best.

Every murderer is probably somebody's old friend.

The function, what a nice form!

Everyone knows what a hypocrite is. That's the guy who gripes about the sex, violence and nudity on his VCR.

Life is an echo. What you send out comes back.

Paraphrased: When Chuang Tzu was about to die, his disciples began planning a splendid funeral. However some disciples expressed concern that given a particular arrangement, birds and kites would eat his remains. Chuang Tzu replied, "Well, above ground I shall be eaten by crows and kites, below it by ants and worms. What do you have against birds?

People respond to political characters in archetypal ways. A fun game is to think of a politician and ask, "Which god is that? Are they like Aries? Are they like Athena?"

I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are mean.

With rap, it's a funny thing. You can say things, and people can take 'em the way they wanna take 'em.

I love baseball, I really do. I always told my Dad, I'm not gonna make it working... I like to play ball too much. Which I did. I played hard. You gotta work at this game. You really do. And its fun doing it if you do it the right way.

If the world was perfect, it wouldn't be.

My grandfather had a wonderful funeral... On the buffet table there was a replica of the deceased in potato salad.

Sex and death. Two things that come but once in my lifetime, but at least after death you're not nauseous.