Fun Quotes - Page 206

That's my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.

It's been so long since I made love, I can't even remember who gets tied up.

The reason old man use Viagra is not that they are impotent. It's that old women are so very ugly.

I had a three year relationship end. Ever have somebody just freak out on you in a relationship? Things are going great. After three years she wants to run out and find a guy that doesn't hit her.

Every morning I hear the alarm, it's like "BEEP BEEP BEEP" For second I'm like, "I could get used to that, just dream I'm in a techno club, or something."

I saw this college team bowling championship. Each team had their own coach. What kind of strategy advice is a bowling coach giving? "You know what? This time Timmy, I want you to knock down all the pins." "You sure?" "Trust me. Just do it son!"

And I knew that there was some dark corner of me that would enjoy using magic for killing—and then long for more. That was black magic, and it was easy to use. Easy and fun. Like Legos

Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

I want to do a good job. I'm just learning and I just want to have fun with it.

I used to hang out at karaoke bars all the time. It was the most fun you could have when you had no money.

Always keep a smile. I attribute my long life to that. I believe I will die laughing. That's part of my program.

We can't all be happy, we can't all be rich, we can't all be lucky - and it would be so much less fun if we were... There must be the dark background to show up the bright colours.

According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about women is their eyes. And women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.

You have to have been a Republican to know how good it is to be a Democrat.

What happened down in the dungeons between you and Professor Quirrell is a complete secret, so, naturally the whole school knows.

Have you ever wondered why young people take to music like fish to water? Maybe it's because music is fun. Plan and simple. It opens up their minds to dream great dreams about where they can go and what they can do when they get older.

The first law of dietetics seems to be: if it tastes good, it's bad for you.

(1) irreversible processes are as real as reversible ones. (2) irreversible processes play a fundamental constructive role in the physical world. (3) irreversibility is deeply rooted in dynamics.

This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.

You look like a talent scout for a cemetery.

My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.

Confront a child, a puppy, and a kitten with a sudden danger; the child will turn instinctively for assistance, the puppy will grovel in abject submission, the kitten will brace its tiny body for a frantic resistance.

A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to Heaven brag about it to persons who will never get there.

A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.