Ifs Quotes - Page 306

If I were actually Homer Simpson, I'd be getting scripts out the wazoo.

If it wasn't painfully difficult, you did it wrong!

I always say this: If you a dude texts you after 2 a.m. and you reply, then you will never get called at 8 p.m. He won't take you serious.

If you go through life and actually get to find out the thing you want to do, you're very lucky.

If I had not been a monk, I would have become an engineer.

If you utilize obstacles properly, then they strengthen your courage, and they also give you more intelligence, more wisdom.

If I were to say you are crazy, what part of that would you find unacceptable?

If it doesn't absorb you, if it isn't any fun, don't do it.

To listen acutely is to be powerless, even if you sit on a throne.

If He isn't Lord of all, He isn't Lord at all.

If television encouraged us to work as much as it encourages us to do everything else, we could better afford to buy more of everything it advertises.

It's part of the institution of teshuva, if you make a mistake, you have to restore it as you can.

If humans had nothing to fight for, they would fight for nothing.

If we are to put the past on trial, where do we stop?

The past is past and I guess if you live in the past, you cease to live.

When I stopped drinking, it was only because I thought if I don't stop, I'm going to die.

If you don't vote, you're a moron.

If you know anything about me - and, if you do, I'm sorry that your life turned out like that.

I don't know now if I'm funny. I just keep talking and hope that I hit something that's funny.

If you can't trust, you can't be trustworthy.

If it's not working before you get married, marriage isn't going to fix it.

If I can do things right, I don't see why everyone else can't.

If it must be done, it's best done bravely.

Really, anyone can learn how to fly. If you can drive a bus, you can fly an airplane.

If surgeons don't get surgeon's block, then why are you allowed to get writer's block?