I'm trying to figure out if I love art enough to be poor.
When you're trying to look pretty, it's a lot easier to compare you to other people. I always felt intimidated in pilot season trying to audition for 'the girlfriend.' Whereas when it's like, 'you're auditioning for the part of this meth addict, trailer park whatever,' it's like, 'Great!'
I'm trying to find myself as a person, sometimes that's not easy to do. Millions of people live their entire lives without finding themselves. But it is something I must do. The best way for me to find myself as a person is to prove to myself that I am an actress.
I'm trying to find myself. Sometimes it's not that easy.
These people are artists. These people are musicians. They're taking it out and trying to express it that way.
I was always trying to do different things to entertain people. And at the same time, I think, I was, whether subconsciously or not, trying to get kicked out of school because I hated it so much.
People alway ask me what advantages fame has started to bring; there are always plenty of free drinks, but other times people wanna put stuff into your drink to kill you off. Their gonna have to try a lot harder if they want to get me.
I try and take everyone's ideals, common morals, flip them around, make people look at them differently, question them, so that you're not always taking things for granted.
When something tragic has happened, you can try to move on and put something tragic behind you, but it rarely works. It's in you when something like that happens. It's physically a part of your life.
I've always had musicianship as a dream since I was really small. I started to take it a bit more seriously when I learned how to write properly when I was 13 or 14. I saw it as a viable career option when I was 18. I thought, I'm going to start trying it and see how it goes.
You try to walk in the light.
To know that one has never really tried - that is the only death
What i'm trying to get at is that to me nothing felt glamorous or exciting or sexually liberating about it. I also think the amount of money you can make escorting is exaggerated (it wasn't uncommon for me to see ads for escorts for 40-60$/hr where I live.)
You're just trying to throw the best pitch you can and make sure you hit your spots. I don't have to force nobody.
I know, it's amazing, but I never feel like I have done anything. When people say that, it makes me uncomfortable because I'm not that kind of person. I just go out there and try to do my job.
Some pain is simply the normal grief of human existence. That is pain that I try to make room for.
The letters I get on the Internet and the responses to my books make it very clear that something is trying to happen. And I'm just one person. There are millions of people really ready to go. We're just not sure where to go yet.
I take very seriously this notion that my highest job is to live a better life, all the time and to the best of my ability. I need to monitor my own progress - take my own inventory - and clean my own closet. I am trying to do all that.
I try to be self-disciplined with my thoughts. It’s our thoughts that matter most, and all the rest falls into line behind that: if I remember who I really am and why I’m on the earth, then I more naturally want to treat my body like a temple and so forth.
I realize that the curriculum is my life on any given day. At this point, more than anything, my spiritual path means looking at every circumstance and trying to see my part in where it's good and where it's not so good.
Instead of praying: 'Dear God, bring me someone fabulous,' try: 'Dear God, make me into someone fabulous.'
We are here to repair the world. I grew up thinking that was what everybody was trying to do.
The end does not justify the means. If we try to be someone we are not in order to achieve a result, then the result cannot help but be something other than what we intended.
Problems come about when we try to direct the flow of the universe rather than allow it to reveal its own design. Inherent in that design is a love for all living things.
Often faith isn't hoping that good times are coming; it's trying to see that the good times are here.